I Didn't Hear What They Said...

But I imagine it went like this:

Luol Deng (#2): I know it was close in the first half, but we kicked Illinois' ass tonight.
Sheldon Williams (wristbands): I played 35 minutes and only had 2 fouls! That's a record.
LD: Yo, Chris Duhon is one gutty MF'er. Brusied ribs and all and led the team in rebounds.
SW: You realize that IF we beat Xavier, we're gonna be in a good spot to take on UConn, right?
LD: Hellz yeah. ALL the pressure is on them. They have like five players that will be first round picks in the NBA draft.
SW: No one is really talking about us right now. Sure, there will be plenty of hype next week before the game, but Coach K will have a whole week to gameplan for the Huskies.
LD: You know he wants to beat that ass since he lost to them back in the 1999 title game.
SW: Totally, you know, this situation is kinda similar to the whole scenario in 1999, except the roles are reversed.
LD: I like our chances. Especially if you can hang with Emeka Okafor.
SW: Yo, don't forget about how well Shav is playing. He's peaking at the right time. Also, JJ's been shooting the ball well as of late. Shit, we'll let Sean Dockery D that punk ass Ben Gordon up. He's money on D.
LD: Man, I can't wait! We should check out Romain Sato's website and spam him or something before the game tomorrow. If we get him off his game, Xavier has no chance.
SW: Yeah, I'm sure one of the scrubs on our bench is an internet geek. Let's Doomsday Worm his ass!
LD: Hahahahahaha
SW: Yo, did you see my future girlfriend Maria Menounos at the Celtics game in Boston last night? Did you know she's from Boston and a huge Celtics fan? I hope Danny Ainge draft's me when I turn pro.
LD: Totally. Have you ever seen her on ET in that skimpy Larry Bird jersey? Dayum! And you'll have to get in line because Danny Boy is gonna trade up this year to get me! Ha! Go Green!